My stomach hurts

When I hurt emotionally, my body reacts by doing the same. And I had a big hit yesterday, a decision that was made and cannot be taken back.

It sucks. This sucks. But God is still good.

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Dancing and pumpkins

It’s been a fun month so far! Though I know it’s been more than a month since I posted haha.

Still trying to convince mom to buy me a switch.

The whole bowsette apocalypse seems to have bowled over. Though to me this was always what I thought the crown would do to him: just make him look human.

I have jumped back onto the animal crossing bandwagon which has been fun.

My desk collection of pumpkins is as follows.

Oh and I’m joining a boxing gym as well as Zumba which is kicking my butt.

Pardon this being kind of a boring read, I have a more in depth post later but I just wanted to kinda check in!

Oh and I’m gonna to church again more regularly by the grace of God.

Is this a good thing??

ArtsiegremlinEver since I got my job, I’ve been going to bed at 8pm and waking up at 5am.  My brain has been all work and hanging out with mom….I deal with computers all day so I haven’t even wanted to look at another screen.  Until tonight when my internet troll tendencies came out again.

I’m not entirely sure this is a good development, because I most often stayed up way too long when I had free time to myself…..  The big thing is the notion of “different selves” that makes me uneasy.

As a kid I always wanted to be myself.  In church, at home, at school, I always tried to be myself.  I always tried to keep constant, didn’t want to be two faced.  And I think to me this kinda sounds like that.  Having things that are relevant in one sphere not being relevant in another….I mean in a work sphere it makes sense to be professional but….I don’t know….

It’s like I finally felt “like an adult” and now sitting here on the computer again I feel like a pocky munching, nasty haired kid…..

Well I guess I have serious identity issues.  Glad I realized that finally haha.

 

Nerves of…jello

I kind of have had a sort of roller coaster of emotional states this week

I had to drive a friend to the ER and I was the whole time. Ironically they were sometimes calmer than I was. But I guess when you have to just watch someone be in distress… All the while I was worried about them being seriously ill…definitely had dad flashbacks…

Art and life so far

I have a tendency to be on the computer all day either looking at Contacts or calling people and also staring at the computer that I put the contacts into. So therefore a lot of my little art updates will be traditional ones.

I’ve definitely gotten a lot more into Pokémon GO. It’s been a great way to be able to enjoy some fun while still doing things and being active. Plus I’m a huge kick into Pokémon related so obviously I was going to keep up. Unfortunately because of that I have spent some actual currency on getting pokeballs and what not. Probably more than I should’ve.

I have been having lots of fun enjoying activities with my coworkers, and I’ve already begun my plans for our wonderful Halloween party. I’m going to be a team rocket grunt!! Already have most of the components fortunately.

Socially however things of been a little bit more difficult. I wake up early, I go to bed early, and I hardly go on Discord anymore at all. My Internet presence has kind of become nonexistent except for Facebook and Twitter. This is not a bad thing at all but also if I was still trying to maintain my career as an artist it would kind of be slowly deflating. Not because of work or because of what I do, but just because of my lack of social media posting. It’s amazing when we live in a world where social media posting could be considered a social activity.

I love my job, did I say I love my job already because I really do. My coworkers are awesome, the product that I sell is one that I would legitimately use hat I have the capacity to use it, and it’s just fun. And also my cubicle is decked out with all of my favorite geeky things to make it feel like my own little home, which I am always always thankful for.

Family wise me and mom are doing well! I am a huge butt sometimes but mom is willing to deal with me. We even had Jenn and Dave over this weekend! It was fun.

And at an ending note Blain is awesome and I love him and here is a fun little couples drawing just because.

Daddy would have been 58 today…

It’s funny. I didn’t really get sad or upset about it until I just typed the title. I know he’s with Jesus. I know it’s the best birthday ever for him in heaven but….does he miss us? I’m sure he’s happy to see family he hasn’t seen before or missed….it’s just….yeah.

I probably won’t be really sad til tomorrow like I was on the day after Father’s Day. But for now I’m ok. My neck strain is more my focus right now.

Ow.

So life has been busy, hard, but good!

So it’s just me and mama now, and at times things have been trying for her given some of my…um….deficiencies.

Despite this I feel like me and mom are starting to sort of relax a bit more from all the stress of daddy’s condition….

But also, I’ve been at my new job a whole month now!! It’s amazing how quickly it’s gone by. We sell epic software that works with CorelDRAW, and makes noobs like me able to make stuff like this.

I still wanna shirt of this.

I feel kinda like I’m finally becoming an “adult” with this job. My parents both working at desk jobs, I was more than ecstatic to be given my own space. And decorate it with geek things!!

All of my coworkers are so funny and good natured, I honestly love it.

Hmmm what else…..?

Oh! I restarted Pokémon go again. I love it and I love the RPGness of it.

Also I was able to make this little poster of me and Blainy. Yay